Recently uncovered documents from the Columbia University Libraries revealed that despite hundreds of years as an independent operation, Columbia University is technically a mere satellite campus for the New Jersey-based Princeton University.…
“When We Go Low, You Go High”: Low Steps Contact Highs Lower Seasonal Depression Rates by 40 Percent
For those looking for the positive effects of climate change, look no further! Research conducted through the Office of Environmental Health and Safety, released earlier this week, shows that contact highs on…
Chef Don’s new dining hall has been an instant hit with both campus pizza enthusiasts and the concerning amount of students who know more than fifty digits of pi. To celebrate the…
Legend has it that under the grate outside Dodge Hall—the one at the top of the stairs from College Walk—lives a gigantic rat. He’s enormous, truly. A full unit of rat, like…
I’m not usually one to brag but honestly, this accomplishment was too big to not announce: last week, I officially found a sublet in New York City for the summer! I know…
Not going to lie—there is nothing more embarrassing than ordering my gluten-free cauliflower-crust pizza in front of a line of 25 hungry college students at the Diana Center Cafe, who now have…
In its latest daring measure to establish sub supremacy over the New York metro area, Columbia Dining has sued the State of New Jersey to obtain complete ownership of the phrase “Mike’s…
According to a leaked press release, it appears that Columbia is finally following suit in the time honored New York trend of shortening names. Starting in Fall 2023, Columbia University will be…
As housing groups are being submitted and dorms chosen (or denied out of disgust), a common phenomenon is sweeping Columbia: that of the friend left out of the housing group because they…
Much to the dismay of countless students, Columbia Dining has just announced that Ferris Booth Commons will no longer be serving their classic cheesecakes, cookies, cupcakes, and handfuls of soggy berries alongside…
