According to newly released data from the Pew Research Center, 99% of undecided voters who haven’t yet filled out their mail-in ballots for the 2024 Presidential Election “just can’t seem to find…
Presidential candidate Kamala Harris’ social media campaign seems to have taken a different direction recently, drawing attention to her newest social media team member, a “Mrs. Styles.” Her latest additions to the…
Hey you! Sick of being just another one of those lanky dweebs who blends into the background of every Halloweekend party? Every second wasted on school work or self care is a…
Have you ever walked by that silly little marble bench while you’re on the way to take up too much space at Milstein’s tiny tables? Ever noticed that the bench has cute…
Following a historic vote, Columbia University has decided that one of its beloved red-tail hawks will now be known as “Tuah.” The Columbia University Student Government held a vote amongst the student…
Midterm season is upon us, and the ennui hangs thicker in the air than the scent of Dig Inn on 113th and Broadway. As you try to ignore the first caress of…
In a brave and controversial stand, one courageous student has spoken out against the devastating impacts of student protests. “These protests are ruining my classic college experience,” writes John Blutarsky, a sophomore…
In preparation for Homecoming, Columbia University’s Board of Trustees have announced their plans to retire Roar-ee and replace him with a new, very chill mascot. This decision comes after controversy over the…
As Hallow’s Eve crawls closer, the bottles on your windowsill might unearth some nightmares. The bottles on your window serve as pleasant decor year-round, but when Halloween comes the evil spirits reawaken.…
Wondering how you’re going to balance your time this October 25-26th between Halloweekend and Parents Weekend? Not sure how you’ll be able to spend enough time with your parents while also serving…
Study rooms are essential to a college student’s academic life. How else can I get work done if I am not alone in a four-foot by four-foot cubicle? I like my studying…
President Armstrong has reportedly been what many call “a little too excited” about the Minouche Shafik Halloween costume she recently put together at Party City. Many of her known associates have reported…