Dear Fed, Every year when winter break rolls around, I always get excited that the best time of year has finally arrived: writing CULPA reviews. After all the suffering I’ve gone through…
On Monday, Columbia Dining, in partnership with the Columbia College and Columbia Engineering office for Multicultural Affairs, announced that Café East will be transformed into an Erewhon come Spring 2025. “At Columbia,…
As temperatures dropped into the 30°F on Wednesday, the Penis Fountains of Low Steps were reported defending their smaller appendage size under the common wives tales of “being cold.” Scientists and university…
International students, who once claimed that they felt intimidated by the cruel New York winter, report feeling adequately prepared to face the freezing cold thanks to the Butler Library entrance wind. The…
It’s rush – sorry, recruitment – weekend at Columbia University, and the mice are out to play (freezing in their mini white dresses and open-toed heels on college walk, of course). We…
Butler Library staff recently switched file-organizing systems and discovered that the average book in the library is not as old as your mom. The Federalist spoke with the head of the project,…
We’ve all seen it: maybe we’re a little touch-starved or maybe the sun is hitting his sculpted bronze body at just the right angle, but there is no denying that the statue…
Following a visit to campus by inspectors from the Middle States Commission on Higher Education, the Columbia Graduate School of Architecture, Planning and Preservation was shut down in a mere thirty seconds.…
In a recent announcement via their diplomatic envoy, “Little France” (the tiny run-off nation located in the narrow corridor between the Lawns and Butler Library) has begun strict enforcement of their border.…
On Friday, the Columbia Federalist staff writers Swalla Manob (CC ‘24) and Ina Ormazbals (GS ‘25) were met with accusations of academic plagiarism as reported anonymously to the administration. Even more shocking…
