I’m not quite sure how to put this tastefully. I tried to end things amicably, but you crossed the line. Boundaries are put in place for a reason, and because of that,…
After pleading with Eric for insight on his difficult courseload, he gave in, emphasizing his charitability in “advising plebeians.” With vigor in his eyes, he revealed, “I haven’t slept in three days,…
Common symptoms are living vicariously through Instagram posts, touch deprivation, lucid dreaming about a life without your blue light glasses, and crying. If you find yourself experiencing these, please reach out to…
5. Bear GryllsPros: Very knowledgeable about surviving in uninhabitable environments, very applicable to NYCCons: Bold, but not beautiful…
Columbia Student Life announces new awards to encourage phone sex in promotion of the health compact
In a bid to encourage safe and healthy interactions on campus, Columbia is rolling out a new program under the #KeepTheCompact umbrella that will promote covid-19 secure intercourse, called #KinkyForTheCommunity.…
The singer wrote, “I’m in the studio working on something special after today’s assault on democracy.” As this terrorist schemes up “something special,” D.C. residents are preparing for the worst.…
Some may respond by referencing how at the 2009 VMAs Kanye said the award should go to Beyonce and not Taylor, implying he is not a hardcore stan. However, arguing about whether…
Back then, there weren’t any pesky child labor laws. I earned my stripes first in a blacking factory, then as a chimney sweep for Charles Dickens. According to the town physician I…
“Sure, the post described ‘a tall, beautiful blonde,’ but from a distance my neon pink hair could appear a bit flaxen,” White reasoned.…
