You spent the last four years studying at the number 12 ranked University in the nation! Congrats! And now you’re graduating, but how will you presumptuously let the world know what you’ve…
Out from the closet when it covers me, Black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whichever coat may be For the unconquerable cold. In the fell clutch of feathers…
Morningside Heights residents were surprised to see Columbia’s typically picturesque campus transformed into an MIT-themed dystopia. The entire university, including the students and buildings, has put on a ‘costume’ modeled after the…
Beilock and Keggy the Keg The Columbia Registrar and Barry Kane U.S. News and #18 Chef Mike and the Very Berry Fruit Salad Prezbo and Mary Boyce 600 and a rat The…
“We live in terror that our hair—our bangs, our highlights, our experiments with wispy mustaches, our pubes for christ’s sake—just won’t be up to code” said one Columbia junior, addressing the Head…
BUTLER LIBRARY — Dim lights flicker through the tunnels beneath Butler Library at 3:00 am. Whispers fill the corridors—they seem to be coming from behind the walls, but one cannot tell exactly…
Common Allergens When you walk into the club, all eyes will be on you. And those eyes will be watery as fuck. Splash some pet dander and dust mites on a cute…
Fork and Spoon = Spork Yellow and blue crayon = green crayon Cord and socket = dongle Two halves of an Avocado = whole Avocado Salt and pepper = Everything-but-the-Bagel seasoning Bride…
