So, the Battle of the Bands happened last Thursday. The student body chose one of Columbus’s most talented musicians to open for what we all know will be some D-list celebrity. I…
I wrote this generic headline to distract the Feditors, but I need to get this message out: I’m being held hostage by the Columbia Federalist. I was undercover in the Fed for…
If you love a slutty little runny nose and sultry wet cough, I have just the place for you: New York’s hottest club is the Columbia Health Clinic. Located on the most…
As a big city college girl grueling away at my work, I’m happy and independent. Alas, it’s the only time of year these movies take place so I’m heading home for the…
It’s not often that Fed needs to come out with an entirely serious piece, but you all have pushed us to our limit. Please, for the love of Jesus, we are not…
Out from the closet when it covers me, Black as the pit from pole to pole, I thank whichever coat may be For the unconquerable cold. In the fell clutch of feathers…
Dear Spotify Wrapped, Look, we all have our phases. Sure, it’s a bit embarrassing to show your friends that Charlie Puth is your top artist when you’re supposed to be all cool…
Columbia’s Uncircumsized Men’s Society (CUMS) has come out this week with an open letter to the Columbia community calling out the university on “decades of marginalization.” CUMS is demanding more architectural representation…
In a world consumed by streaming platforms, major television networks are willing to try anything to get you out of your Netflix, Disney+, and Dropout subscriptions and into the jaws of a…
Morningside Heights residents were surprised to see Columbia’s typically picturesque campus transformed into an MIT-themed dystopia. The entire university, including the students and buildings, has put on a ‘costume’ modeled after the…
