"I’ve never introduced myself without explicitly mentioning it: 'He/Him/His, Columbia College, Burbank, California.'"…
Op-Ed: I Have A Right To Free Speech, So Let Me Practice My Monologue In Your Apartment
by Anonymous
"My audition is coming up, and the fact that you won’t let me run my lines by you while you’re watching TV is a textbook infringement on my right to free speech."…
"Society makes people bad, but more like, cheat-on-your-spouse bad – not Sean-level bad."…
“We realized no grocer in the nation gives customers the choice of whether to bid or buy now, which made us think: ‘Why not let people enter bidding wars for that last…
"When I finally ran into her standing in sweatpants and a boring green cardigan in front of Butler, she just looked like a mere mortal."…
“I’m getting real tired of this salad shit. Can someone drop me a fucking burger?”…
“I even moved some girl’s warm bra and panties to check for my virginity underneath...but it was nowhere to be found."…
Moving one’s bowels is like real estate—it’s all about location, location, location!…
"There are still some holdouts who experience brief moments of fleeting happiness."…
"The New Yorker spells out for me exactly how I should behave and what I should desire."…
