The sensible answer to whether you should or should not use a dating app in your hometown is ….. NO.
However, The Fed is realistic. We know our readers are bored and hungry for some dramaaaaa. Nothing in life is as boring as day 12 of endlessly scrolling through Instagram in your childhood bedroom. Here are some ways to keep yourself entertained this winter break with the help of Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, and maybe even Grindr 😉
- For the queers, see who is gay (duh). Easiest for shock value, and hits every time. Give them a few years and they’ll be hitting you up when they want to move to NYC. *Negative aura points if they made fun of you for being gay in high school.
- For underclassmen, see which high school couples broke up. Long distance is so over…like half of your high school couples will realize that by the end of freshman fall semester. Make it a game: try to see which photos on their dating app profile were taken by their ex!
- For the drama seekers, find out who is cheating and (maybe) blackmail them! The Fed does not endorse blackmailing, unless, of course, you give us 50% of your profits.
- For the hopeless romantic, try to find your high school crush. Yeah, things didn’t work out junior year, but maybe it’s time to reconnect? That just wasn’t your moment or how “your guys’ story” was meant to be. Maybe this is…probably not, but maybe.
- For those who love a drinking game, drink every time you see a fish being held, a pickup truck, a selfie in your local mall’s mirror, a friend’s ex, or a high-waisted jean.
- For the mentally sane, don’t. <3
