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Where Should You Take Your Valentine’s Date?

by and

If you, like us, are prone to procrastination and indecision, it might be hard to find a spot to take your date. Luckily, we Fed writers, with an extensive familiarity with all things romance, have you covered. 

  1. How did you and your partner meet?
    1. On Tinder. Swiped right on every profile that didn’t say NYU.
    2. We were study partners in A.P. U.S. History. (I got a 5 on the exam, by the way.)
    3. I got their number from our NSOP group chat.
    4. In Butler at 4AM, speed-typing an essay that was due two days ago.
  2. How long have you known them?
    1. We just met. 
    2. Years!
    3. A few months but we haven’t really hung out much, except that time we made eye contact in the Ferris line and really quickly looked away.
    4. We haven’t met yet, but I know I’m a catch. I’ll figure it out.
  3. What’s your favorite thing to do together?
    1. Idk… nNetflix and chill I guess?
    2. Everything. We share our whole lives, and no matter where I am, I know the other half of my heart is with them <3.
    3. Be productive with our FroSci study group.
    4. Write for the Fed.
  4. What’s your major?
    1. Econ
    2. Creative Writing
    3. CS
    4. Undecided! Lol (I graduate in two semesters, please help me).
  5. What’s one thing you would change about your partner?
    1. They ask too much of me. Like, come on. I’m just one person. You expect me to remember our anniversary and your birthday?
    2. I wish they weren’t vegan.
    3. I wish they would stop calling me by my roommate’s name.
    4. For starters, I prefer blondes.
  6. What did you do last year on Valentine’s Day?
    1. Went crazy at Beta!! Those are my boys!!
    2. Exchanged promise rings.
    3. Binge-watched Season 12 of The Office
    4. Oh boy… are you sure you want all the steamy details? 😉

If you chose mostly As — To really sweep your partner off their feet, you should meet up at the nicest 99 cent pizza place within walking distance, a solid forty-five minutes after you agreed to meet them there. Follow dinner with a romantic whirlwind stop at Mel’s, where you’ll be overcharged for the Valentine’s Day special cocktails, and finish the night off with a leisurely stroll through your Carman dorm hall/frat house walkup. 

If you chose mostly Bs — Your Valentine’s Day will start off with a long, romantic Zoom, because you and your partner live four hours apart from each other. After a Netflix Party screening of Cheer that doesn’t work because someone’s WiFi keeps crapping out, you’ll finish the night off with a passive-aggressive phone call from your mother, telling you that you would have been so much happier if you had just gone to college nearby and you could come home every weekend.

If you chose mostly Cs — You should probably go with a group date because you’re uncomfortable with emotional intimacy. Take a couple friends (who are just as single as you) to Koronets. Make awkward eye contact with your date to show that they aren’t just a friend, but also don’t make them feel too special because they might set expectations you know you can’t meet.

If you choose mostly Ds — Good luck ever escaping the friend zone.